Relationships, good or bad, they make us who we are. The people of our world, they make our world go round. I am filled with gratitude when I reflect on all of the amazing people of my world. My people span different time zones, paradigms, generations and beliefs. They are very unique pieces of my very quirky little puzzle. As I continue to move, grow and change, so do my people; my tribe. Of course, there will always be the Senate-type members that are in it for the long haul. To them, I am forever grateful.
After high school, I had an amazing opportunity to move away from home to complete my Undergraduate Degree. And by move away, I bounced 3000km away from the roost I had been in my entire life. One of the best decisions I ever made. Was it difficult? Yes. But that is the nature of growth, It is difficult. I left the bubble of my town (population 250) to spread my wings in Canada’s largest city (all or nothing!). Much like a Homing pigeon, I always knew that someday I would return to my homeland. I have very deep roots and yes, that meant leaving my tribe behind. It was a very sad time for me. I had become accustomed to a life where my people were either a street car ride away, a ten minute walk away or in the next room. It was amazing and I completely took it for granted. Now, my tribe is scattered across this amazing country. Does it suck? Absolutely. The silver lining? Multiple time zones. When my brain is on fire, it is likely one of them is still awake, just waking up, home from work, on their lunch break, etc. For a girl who is a part of ‘Generation instant gratification’ (much to my dismay), it has worked out swimmingly.
So how does one choose their tribe? First and foremost, quality must supersede convenience. Always. Distance is hard, communication takes effort but it will all seem irrelevant when you reach out and are met with exactly what you needed. These are the people who always know exactly what to say, how to say it and when to say it. They are your biggest cheerleaders but also the most constructive critics. They are your free advice. Reach out. Listen.
As for my tribe, what am I looking for? Or better yet, what is it that I need to be successful? Here are my top three:
- Validation. My tribe are some of the most honest people around, blunt and to the point. But, they know me best and when I hear their encouraging words, it confirms what I already feel. And when they don’t validate my ideas? It is usually for a reason.
- Accountability. I thrive on it, I need it to survive. This could very much be the athlete in me. A dream cannot be put into action when it is a secret, share it. Once you do, you are now accountable to someone other than yourself.
- Honesty. I know how I operate and when I get something in my mind I go after it. Hard. I am tireless, I am impatient and I am straight up annoying. My tribe knows this very well about me, they tolerate it and have come to expect it. But, they don’t let my stubbornness bully them into false encouragement. The truth can hurt, but it is pivotal for growth.
As you build your tribe, I leave you with this:
In everyone’s life, at some time, our inner fire goes out. It is then burst into flame by an encounter with another human being. We should all be thankful for those people who rekindle the inner spirit.
– Albert Schweitzer
These are the people who belong in your tribe.
lise
xo.
life in the silver lining 